Britcent - [S6E7] Wedding

Steph  00:02

Hi, Dalya.

 

Dalya  00:04

Buongiorno, Stephanie. 

 

Steph  00:05

Buongiorno. How are you? 

 

Dalya  00:08

Is that Italian? 

 

Steph  00:09

That is Italian, yes.

 

Dalya  00:10

Ah. Okay, good. I'm very well, thank you; feeling very snuggly and cosy in this cold weather.

*snuggly 아늑한, 편안한

 

Steph  00:17

Oh, very nice. I like that. Yeah, it is freezing but not as cold as it was when it was snowing. Luckily, it's cleared up now.

*clear up (날씨가) 개다.

 

Dalya  00:25

And not as cold as Korea; apparently minus 15 there.

 

Steph  00:28

Really? My goodness. Okay, it didn't get that cold here, did it? It was, like, minus, what was it, minus three, four?

 

Dalya  00:35

Well, in some places it got to minus eight.

 

Steph  00:38

Did it really? Oh my god. Wow. Yeah. Well, we're back up now to, I don't know, ten? 

 

Dalya  00:46

Ten degrees. 

 

Steph  00:48

Brilliant. So what are we talking about today? What is our topic of the day?

 

Dalya  00:53

We are talking about-- 

 

Steph  00:56

Can anyone guess?

 

Dalya  00:59

The Olympics! No. It's weddings!

 

Steph  01:04

Weddings because this is something that I think we've both heard is very different in Korea in comparison to England. 

 

Dalya  01:12

Yeah, definitely. 

 

Steph  01:13

So it's another comparison based on research from our lovely South Korean students.

 

Dalya  01:18

Yeah, notes from the field. 

 

Steph  01:20

Yeah. So it seems that weddings, well, from what I've understood, weddings in South Korea seem to be generally quite big, I would say. Obviously, I guess it depends on the person. But they seem to-- they tend to kind of invite--

 

Dalya  01:38

Everyone. 

 

Steph  01:38

--all of their colleagues and stuff. 

 

Dalya  01:40

Oh, colleagues, as well? I didn't know that. 

 

Steph  01:41

Yeah. Which is-- I think that's quite unusual in the UK, wouldn't you say? Unless they're like really close, colleagues who are close friends, I suppose.

 

Dalya  01:49

Yeah, if they're your friends, you definitely would but not if it's just somebody that you work with. 

 

Steph  01:55

That's it. But a lot of my students have said that they would invite like the whole office--

 

Dalya  01:59

Oh my god.

 

Steph  02:00

--to their wedding. Yeah.

 

Dalya  02:01

That's expensive. 

 

Steph  02:03

I think it's expensive, but then they do talk about, obviously, when people come to their wedding, they get money. They get a gift, which is money, usually.

 

Dalya  02:13

Maybe I should get married in Korea, then. 

 

Steph  02:15

Yeah, maybe. There you go. And another way of saying 'get married' is 'tie the knot'.

*tie the knot 결혼을 하다.

 

Dalya  02:21

'Tie the knot.'

 

Steph  02:22

I wonder why we say that though, tie the knot. 

 

Dalya  02:27

Oh, I looked it up. Apparently it's from an old tradition. They actually would, at the wedding, they would tie-- hmm, maybe my research wasn't very good. I think there was something to do with tying a knot. I think they actually tied the hands of the bride and the groom together.

*look something up (컴퓨터, 참고 자료에서 정보를) 찾아보다. 

*knot 매듭

*bride and groom 신랑 신부

 

Steph  02:30

Okay, that sounds really freaky. I think if someone tried to do that to me, I might get cold feet. 

*freaky 기이한

 

Dalya  02:44

Go away. 

 

Steph  02:46

Run away. It's a bit late by then, though, right? I dunno.

*by then 그때즘에는

 

Dalya  02:51

Well, you can't run away because your hands are tied. That's the point. 

 

Steph  02:53

That's the point. "You must get married now!" Yeah, so in the UK, I would say that weddings are generally, I mean, a time to kind of celebrate, obviously, and like have loads of fun with your friends and family. Drink loads.

 

Dalya  03:12

Excuse to party. 

 

Steph  03:13

Yeah. We dance a lot at weddings. It's important to have music and dancing, which is why it was so difficult during COVID lockdown, like when weddings were allowed to go ahead with limited numbers, but we were not allowed to dance.

 

Dalya  03:30

Or sing, yeah I know.

 

Steph  03:32

So hard.

 

Dalya  03:33

I think that's one of the biggest differences - if this is correct - between Korean weddings and, let's say, I don't know, British, European weddings is that there doesn't seem to be much music slash no music and dancing after the meal. If I'm correct.

 

Steph  03:48

Yeah, some of my students got married this year and they told me about their weddings, but dancing was not something that was included. So that's a massive difference, I would say. Although, strangely - I'm saying 'strangely' because for us it's unusual - is that instead of dancing, they would sing. 

*strangely 이상하게

 

Dalya  04:11

Oh, what do you mean? 

 

Steph  04:13

So I've had a few of my students who've said, "Oh, yeah, my future husband and I will be singing a song for our--"

 

Dalya  04:22

What, like a concert? 

 

Steph  04:23

Well, not a concert, but they actually like practice a song together and they perform it. 

 

Dalya  04:27

That's so cute, I love that. 

 

Steph  04:29

Yeah, but we would perform a dance. So if we did anything like that--

 

Dalya  04:33

That's true, that's true. 

 

Steph  04:34

--what we call the first dance, and some couples rehearse that in advance and, you know, put on a kind of performance, I suppose, at that first dance. But we would never do that for singing, would we, really?

*put on a performance 공연을 하다.

 

Dalya  04:49

No. They'd also be too drunk for that.

 

Steph  04:51

They'd also be very drunk, yeah. But it's interesting because my students have said to me, "Oh, no, I would never like dance. That's so embarrassing!" But for us, it's like singing is so embarrassing.

*embarrassing 쑥스러운, 당혹스러운

 

Dalya  05:01

Yeah. Way more embarrassing. True. Ah, interesting. So is it, like, with a band or a capella?

 

Steph  05:09

I really don't know.

 

Dalya  05:10

Because you'd have to, you'd have to, if it were the band, you'd have to have like a band practice.

 

Steph  05:16

Maybe they have a backing track or something? 

*backing track 반주

 

Dalya  05:18

Oh, that's a good point. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

 

Steph  05:20

So that's a big difference. So in England, or in the UK, even in Europe, like European weddings, dancing is major, but singing is not. What else is different? Have you ever heard any, have you heard any other--

 

Dalya  05:36

Well, obviously, the traditional Korean ceremony, which I know not every wedding has, with the whole, the hanbok, that's very obviously very, very different and elaborate. Very beautiful, colourful.

*with the whole 전반적으로, 대체로

*elaborate 정교한, 공들인

 

Steph  05:49

That's very true.

 

Dalya  05:50

I think my students have said that-- maybe this isn't actually a difference, they say that there's a huge emphasis on photos. And, of course, here, there is also, you know, a massive emphasis on photos, but there they say it's-- some people have gone so far as to say, "It's all about the photos."

*go so far as to do 심지어 ~하기까지 하다.

 

Steph  06:07

Oh, really? 

 

Dalya  06:09

I suppose that depends on the person.

 

Steph  06:10

You mean, like, they kind of have to have it formalised that they've done it and they've got married, and these are the photos and...

*formalise 형식화하다, 공식화하다.

 

Dalya  06:19

Yeah, just the photos are super important. 

 

Steph  06:20

As a memory. Mm. Yeah. 

 

Dalya  06:23

Which is understandable. 

 

Steph  06:24

I would say photos are pretty important here as well. 

 

Dalya  06:27

Yeah, it's true. 

 

Steph  06:30

Yeah, in fact, photos sometimes take ages at weddings. I don't know how many weddings you've been to, but I've been to a few weddings where you're hanging around waiting for ages for anything to happen because the bride and groom are off having their photos taken for like an hour or more.

*take ages 오랜 시간이 걸리다.

*hang around ~에서 기다리다, 서성거리다.

 

Dalya  06:44

What I always find when I ever look at people's wedding photos, is that you have a photo of every single combination of people. You have the bride's family, the groom's family, the bride's family and the groom's family, and then the bride and her friends. And then it's, like, a mathematical equation.

 

Steph  07:02

It's a big thing. Yeah. And it takes ages. It really does. Yeah, but then I've been to a couple of weddings where they weren't that fussed about photos. So they kind of just had it all done in half an hour, which is unheard of at most weddings. I think most weddings it takes a while to do all of that. 

*not be fussed about ~에 대해 개의치 않다.

*unheard of ~에 대해 전례가 없는, 듣도보도 못한

*at most 기껏해야

 

Dalya  07:21

Yeah, I just realised I've never been to a proper wedding because my friend's one was just a kind of ceremony because it was classic post-COVID. They had the real wedding like most people did, with just their close family, and then two years later, they had a massive party, so I got to just go to the best bit. 

 

Steph  07:41

That is the best bit, yeah. 

 

Dalya  07:43

So there were no proper, there was no proper wedding-- sorry, no proper photo taking.

 

Steph  07:48

Oh, I see. I see. Yeah, I get what you mean. That's another thing, like my Korean students have said that in Korea, the weddings are very short. 

 

Dalya  07:57

Yeah, I've heard that; just a few hours. 

 

Steph  07:59

Yeah. Maximum, like two hours or something. In the UK, it's like if you're invited to a wedding, you're going to be there the whole day and night. Like you're not gonna-- you can't schedule in anything else on that day. 

*the whole day and night 꼬박 하루

 

Dalya  08:10

Yeah, have a quick coffee. 

 

Steph  08:12

You can't be like, "Oh, yeah, I'm just gonna, you know, meet my friends for brunch, then go to a wedding, then go out for dinner." 

 

Dalya  08:16

Like, "I'm just gonna take my dog for a walk." 

 

Steph  08:17

Yeah, it just doesn't happen.

 

Dalya  08:19

Yeah, it's a bit of a write off, isn't it?

*write off 아무것도 할 수 없는 시기

 

Steph  08:21

Kind of because we normally-- I would say most weddings start during the daytime at some point. And then obviously, you've got the morning to get ready and get to the wedding. And then the ceremony maybe takes about-- the ceremony is not usually that long, obviously, it depends on what kind of ceremony you have. But it's definitely no more than an hour. And then after the ceremony, there's photos and then there's like food and drink. And then speeches. Of course, that's important; speeches, by the-- well, the groom makes a speech and then obviously the bride's father makes a speech, the best man, there's like-- 

*at some point 어느 순간에

 

Dalya  08:59

All men. Where are the women? 

 

Steph  09:00

At least three, and they're all men. Traditionally, they're all men.

 

Dalya  09:03

No comment. 

 

Steph  09:05

You can break tradition, if you wish, but, you know--

 

Dalya  09:07

Actually, my friend did break tradition. Her mum made a speech, which was really nice. 

 

Steph  09:11

Oh, that's so nice. 

 

Dalya  09:12

Actually, both of them did; the mum of the bride and the groom made speeches. 

 

Steph  09:16

Oh, lovely. Yeah, so the tradition is for the men to do it. But, obviously, there are loads of traditions, you know, like old traditions that people no longer follow these days, I suppose. You know? And actually recently, we spoke about names, didn't we, and the meaning of names. And one thing that we do in the UK which is still quite traditional, I think, is that usually the wife takes her husband's name. 

 

Dalya  09:46

Yeah, true. 

 

Steph  09:48

So once you get married, your surname changes, basically.

 

Dalya  09:52

Yeah, but a lot of people, they-- it's such a faff, isn't it, to actually legally change your name and all of the documents; a lot of people they just wait for their documents to expire.

*faff 정신없이 굶, 법석을 떪

 

Steph  10:04

And then...

 

Dalya  10:05

Like their driving licence, and then on the new one, they just put the new name because when you have to change fifteen hundred documents with your name. So I think I've heard quite a few people say they didn't change their name purely because it's just such a huge effort.

 

Steph  10:19

Yeah, because you've got everything, literally everything with that name you've had forever. And then, suddenly, you have to change everything. It's a lot. Yeah. So let's look back at our three phrases that our listeners were hopefully listening out for. 

 

Dalya  10:36

Hopefully. 

 

Steph  10:37

Hopefully. Our first one was 'tie the knot'. 

 

Dalya  10:42

Yep. This is probably the most common marriage idiom, isn't it? 

 

Steph  10:47

I think so. Yeah. 

 

Dalya  10:48

Classic. 

 

Steph  10:49

And it's very simple. It just means 'get married'. 

 

Dalya  10:52

Yeah, literally. 

 

Steph  10:52

That's what it means. Yeah. But it's more of an informal expression, isn't it, like a colloquial expression?

*more of ~에 가까운

*colloquial 구어의, 일상적인 대화체의

 

Dalya  10:58

Yeah, yeah. So we could say, for example, "Call me old-fashioned, but I believe you shouldn't live with your partner until you've tied the knot."

 

Steph  11:09

Okay. I mean, that is a bit old-fashioned, I would say.

 

Dalya  11:13

I feel like here, it's actually the opposite, isn't it? Most people, they buy a house with their partner and then they get married.

 

Steph  11:18

And they get married, if they do, because some people decide not to. 

 

Dalya  11:22

Yeah. 

 

Steph  11:24

Another example; you could say, "It's been a rough year, financially, for me. Four of my best friends have tied the knot so I've spent a lot of money on tuxedo rentals and wedding gifts." 

 

Dalya  11:37

And I feel like this is very apt, right, because they said last year-- no, this year was, the amount of people getting married was the highest since like the 80s because they were all postponed because of COVID.

*apt 적절한

 

Steph  11:48

Oh, yeah, I can imagine. Yeah. 

 

Dalya  11:49

So one of my friends actually did go to four weddings this year, and they were all abroad.

 

Steph  11:54

Oh my god. 

 

Dalya  11:55

It was mad. 

 

Steph  11:56

Wow. That's a lot of money spent on accommodation, flights. Oh my goodness. Fun, though. 

 

Dalya  12:04

Slash stressful. 

 

Steph  12:05

But stressful, yeah. What was our next one? We said, oh, yeah, 'get cold feet.' So what does that one mean?

*get cold feet (계획했던 일에) 갑자기 겁이나다.

 

Dalya  12:12

So it means to feel too frightened to do something that you had planned to do. And it's usually used for this context, so to talk about someone changing their mind regarding marriage, but you can use it to talk about other things as well. So, for example, if you are performing in a concert, and then suddenly beforehand, you get nervous and you don't want to perform, you could say, "Are you getting cold feet?"

 

Steph  12:34

Yeah, exactly. Very good. You could say, "I think people who marry young are more likely to get cold feet before the wedding." 

 

Dalya  12:44

Do you think that's true? 

 

Steph  12:46

Not sure, really. 

 

Dalya  12:49

Who knows? 

 

Steph  12:49

I can't say. Oh, I think it's good to think carefully before you do get married, so maybe don't get married too young.

 

Dalya  12:57

I thought you're gonna say, "So just don't get married."

 

Steph  12:59

Don't get married. That's it. 

 

Dalya  13:03

So we could also say - oh, this is a nice positive one, "Neither of us had cold feet on our wedding day. It was such a happy celebration of our love. And surprisingly stress free." 

 

Steph  13:14

Wow. That is surprising. Very good. And the final one, which we mentioned not that long ago, was to 'take someone's name'. And this basically means that you adopt your partner's surname after you get married. As I said before, it's mostly women who do this in the UK. So you could say, "It's common for women to take their husband's name after marriage." When we say name, we obviously mean surname. Not their first name. 

 

Dalya  13:48

You don't call yourself David if you--

 

Steph  13:50

The surname, yeah. Yeah. And another example could be, "Your surname is Evans, right?" "No, actually, I got married and took my husband's name so it's Simon now." That's it. 

 

Dalya  14:06

Which is quite a common thing you'll hear.

 

Steph  14:09

Exactly. Yeah, very common over here in the UK. Well, I think that's all we have time for for today.

 

Dalya  14:17

It is indeed. 

 

Steph  14:18

Lovely talking to you, as always. 

 

Dalya  14:20

You too. 

 

Steph  14:21

Have a great rest of the week. 

 

Dalya  14:23

Yeah. And stay warm. 

 

Steph  14:25

Stay warm. So before we used to say 'stay safe', now we like to say 'stay warm'.

 

Dalya  14:30

That's true. Oh, maybe it's truly post-COVID. Who knows? 

 

Steph  14:33

Yay. Finally. Okay, well stay warm. Take care and stay safe.

 

Dalya  14:40

Bye-bye.